Every type and subtype has feelings in some way. 369 deal with feelings by denying them all together. 1257 escape their own feelings by fixating on something or someone other than their own feelings. 48 go deeper and deeper into their feelings, getting lost in them, with the highest highs and the lowest lows.
Please note all the descriptions in this post are for unhealthy to average levels of the types and instincts. At healthy levels, all types rise above their type struggles and achieve inner peace.
DEEP EMOTIONAL CONNECTORS
The 3 deepest emotional connectors between people are at Type 4, Type 8, and SX Instinct.
(468, the three numbers of the so-called “Reactive Triad,” all have deep connection, but 6 deep connection is loyalty-based, and thought-based, not emotion-based.)
4s and 8s connect at wanting. 4s yearn: 4w5 avoids attention and yearns alone in quiet (e.g. painters), 4w3 seeks attention and puts those yearnings on show (e.g. singers), but both 4w5 and 4w3 are endlessly wandering, soul-seeking, and never satisfied with anything they find. 8s lust: 8w7 lusts loudly after a myriad of things, 8w9 lusts stealthily after more and more comfort, but both 8w7 and 8w9 never, ever stop moving, and no matter how much they acquire, it is never enough.
4s and 8s share a special connection when they share their deepest desires, the infinite wanting, seeking transcendence and eternity, and never finding satisfaction or peace no matter how high they fly or how deep they dive.
4s dwell in the past, 8s chase after the future, and neither is present, in the now, both of them always wanting what they cannot have.
8s need to be heard and feel understood. They cannot hold back the high tide of emotion, a tide which overwhelms all the other types except 4s, who are the low tide. 4s are listeners, and not detached listeners like the 5, but attached, empathic listeners. 8s cannot stop expressing the feelings that 4s keep within.
There can be a beautiful balance between the high energy of an 8 and the low energy of a 4 as they both go to 2 and fulfilling each other’s emotional needs, or a violent volatility as they become cold (135 are the cold numbers), withdraw and look down on each other, with the 8 at 5 (withdrawn) and the 4 at 1 (judgemental).
SX is all-consuming, seeking to consume and be consumed by one Other person. It is the sexual instinct, the death instinct. Two SXs together create their own world, their own reality, rip out their own hearts to give to the other, meld their souls, live and breathe each other’s existence. An SX without that Other Half continues to seek for connection, wandering and searching for that world to share alone with another person.
NON-CONNECTORS
369 all deny the core emotion of their centers. 3 denies sadness/shame, 6 denies fear, and 9 denies rage. They are the unfeeling or numb types.
1s feel very strongly that everything is right or wrong, black or white, and try to impose their standards of morality on themselves at SP, another person at SX, or a social group at SO. They are the teachers, lawmakers, judges, policemen.
2s feelings are about needs: their own needs at SP, another’s needs at SX, and a social group’s needs at SO. The 2 focus on needs instead of feelings makes it difficult for 2s to connect deeply.
5s feelings are deeply hidden within themselves. 7s feelings are scattered and distracted, about everything except themselves. Either way, they have trouble connecting deeply with others at 5 or at 7.
SP are all about ensuring physical survival (food, shelter, clothing, sex, money). Their attention is directed inwards towards themselves. They may connect with another person if that person is what they consider part of their SP (parent, sibling, spouse, child) but it will be caring for that person’s SP needs as opposed to caring about the person’s feelings and motivations.
SO are about contributing to or controlling a social group. They seek to connect many people, usually in their area of interest, but their primary attention is oriented to a group of people, not a single person.